Sunday, January 27, 2013

Our Sacred Commitment

Welcome to Marriage Monday!

How Marriage Works:
21 Secrets Every Couple Needs to Know

Secret #18: Commitment is our sure promise that provides security and stability during a marriage crisis. 

Q. What do circus high wire acts and marriage have in common?
(Besides extreme trust, interlaced body parts, and shiny red suits ... )

In a marriage, one has the opportunity to create a legacy or fall prey to divorce. The tragic thing about divorce is that it affects SO many more people than just the couple involved. Our life road is mapped out by the choices we make. My husband and I desire a strong, everlasting marriage, being wise to the roadblocks that may come our way. However, we chose marriage and we continue to chose marriage everyday. We are blessed to share in a union that God has created for us.Katy Montgomery

A. A safety net! Both marriage and high wire acts require a very strong safety net below the surface to provide security and protection against missteps, sudden mishaps, and mistakes.

You Can Rebuild Happiness in Your Marriage

In marriage, that safety net is good old-fashioned commitment. Commitment is the critical undergirding that keeps couples and their families safe from disaster. When communication fails, disease strikes, or economic hardships arrive, our commitment to one another allows our marriage to temporarily fall off the high wire of happiness. Commitment keeps it from shattering to pieces on the ground.

God intended for married couples to experience great happiness within their exclusive union. But isn’t marriage intended to make us holy you might ask? Yes. Of course. But should we gain the knowledge and skills to achieve a measure of happiness in marriage? Again, the answer is absolutely—Yes.

We know that life has its good times and bad times. Similarly, happiness in marriage ebbs and flows. Sometimes we’re able traverse the high wire of daily life in perfect harmony, laughing, and enjoying each other from one end to the other. Unfortunately, because of sin, our marriages face difficulties and hardships too. During those crisis periods, we get out of balance as a couple. Bailing out and starting over with someone else can seem like a very attractive idea.

Both marriage and high wire acts require a very strong safety net below the surface to provide security and protection against missteps, sudden mishaps, and mistakes.

However, like the undergirding of a circus safety net, our strength of commitment allows us to stay together through the difficult days, while working toward a better tomorrow. When negative circumstances force us off the high wire of marital happiness and down into the safety net of commitment, we can be assured that God will help us find a way to climb up the ladder of happiness once again.

From Faith to Hope, and Then On to Love

Christian marriage counselor, Willard Harley PhD observed that couples who are in love, never divorce. His successful clinical work has focused on helping distressed marriage partners fill each other's “emotional love tanks” in order to fall in love again.

In light of Dr. Harley’s counseling success, you can picture of commitment as both the safety net and the high wire itself. Commitment acts like a bridge between two opposite extremes: an angry divorce and long-term marital satisfaction. Commitment gives us the necessary time during and afer a marriage crisis to traverse the wire from one side to the other. Commitment empowers a couple to carefully proceed away from a state of conflict and toward the balanced state of relational happiness they both long for.

Commitment acts like faith, for it fuels hope. And hope can lead you back to loveif you allow it to. If your marriage is in turmoil, you may be considering your options. I encourage you to fufill your sacred marriage vows, and say NO to the temptation file for divorce. But don't go it alone! Seek the help of a competent professional today.


Marriage: What Makes Women Happy?
Is Marriage for Happiness or Holiness?
Does Divorce Make People Happy?

Photos: gynti_46 (Flickr)

Take heed then to your spirit, and let no one deal treacherously against the wife of your youth. For I hate divorce,” says the Lord, the God of Israel, “and him who covers his garment with wrong,” says the Lord of hosts. “So take heed to your spirit, that you do not deal treacherously.” (Mal 2:15-16 NASB)

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Lori ~ The Simple Life at Home said...

nice A said...

True, even if we had serious struggles in the past, through God's grace we're able to restore the happiness of our marriage. Through our commitment for each other, we weathered the destructive storms of our marriage.

Thanks again, e-Mom, for another interesting topic and for the chance of deep reflection on my own marriage experience.

God bless.

(Something wrong with the Linky?) Here's my post:

Miriam Pauline said...

Yes, a safety net. A way of catching ourselves when we lose sight of why we do this marriage thing and holding us until we can get back on track.

Thanks for a wonderful, thought-provoking article. Blessings.

Tami Boesiger said...

Interesting analogy, e-Mom. I suppose our commitment does catch us when we fall from each others graces. I found this a tough topic to write on. I don't really think about it that much, I guess. Maybe it's a wonder I'm still married!

Constance said...

I like the idea of choosing marriage every day. I am nuts about my husband and then there some days when dealing with him just flat out, MAKES me nuts!! Commitment is key! Life is filled with enough junk and it's hard facing it alone. The commitment and investment of time, energy and emotion have sustained Dave and I in the most difficult of times; it's drawn us closer than ever.

I am back to MM and plan to participate regularly once again.

Beth said...

Commitment is so crucial to the success of marriage and the deepening of love. Thanks for encouraging us to highlight and discuss this very necessary ingredient in married life, e-Mom.

Denise said...

Great post, as always.

Faith said...

love the analogy of the safety net under a high wire act! great post! thanks for encouraging us to think deeply about our own marriages and how we stay committed :) God bless!! (and thanks for linking me up! right now we are getting a mix of sleet and snow...UGH...and ballet is NOT cancelled tonite so off to cook an early dinner I go! :) )

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