A Mother with a Mission and a Method
"I am content to fill a little space if God be glorified."—Susannah Wesley
Susannah Wesley was the mother of 19 children, including John and Charles Wesley, the founders of Methodism. Although she faced much adversity, she dedicated her life to instilling Christian values into each child. Susannah's sacrifices paid off; her children went on to change the world.
Susannah is famous for the 16 rules she laid down in her home.
1. Eating between meals not allowed.
2. As children they are to be in bed by 8 p.m.
3. They are required to take medicine without complaining.
4. Subdue self-will in a child, and those working together with God to save
the child's soul.
5. To teach a child to pray as soon as he can speak.
6. Require all to be still during Family Worship.
7. Give them nothing that they cry for, and only that when asked for politely.
8. To prevent lying, punish no fault which is first confessed and repented of.
9. Never allow a sinful act to go unpunished.
10. Never punish a child twice for a single offense.
11. Comment and reward good behavior.
12. Any attempt to please, even if poorly performed, should be commended.
13. Preserve property rights, even in smallest matters.
14. Strictly observe all promises.
15. Require no daughter to work before she can read well.
16. Teach children to fear the rod.
This excerpt has been quoted from Family of Destiny: Encouraging Words for Christian Families. If you would like to read more about Mrs. Wesley's life and family, click here.
What is Methodism?
"The roots of Methodism comprised a group of 18th-century Oxford University students called the “Holy Club,” amongst whom were its founders, John and Charles Wesley. The term Methodism is a pejorative college nickname for that group, which described the methodical approach they used to study the Bible.Gathering regularly for Bible study, prayer and self-examination, the group began a tradition that would lead to the second-largest Protestant denomination in America and a worldwide membership of approximately 11 million people, of which 8.6 million live in the United States." Discover more here...
Related: The Carnival of Homeschooling is a wonderful resource for thoughtful Moms and Dads. Also, Barbara H. hosts a meme on Mondays called The Week in Words. You're invited to link any quote you've posted on your blog during the past week.
Top Photo: AdWriter (Flickr)
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Was Mrs. Wesley too severe? What would you add to (or remove from) her list?
20 Comments:
I admire her dedication to mothering and clear rules, but there are some things I'd change. I like snacks, for one. :) I really appreciate numbers 5 - 15. I'm not sure about 16 -- correction and discipline are necessary. But I'm often reminded that God's rod and staff comfort us. Discipline shouldn't be harsh -- firm and appropriate, yes.
Susannah Wesley was one of the greats! I love the fact that she had rules that she reared her children by - and with the number of children she had, those rules would be absolutely necessary. I'd keep her list just as it is.
well, i make my kids go to bed at 7 lol, i might be meaner! lol.
but no, i don't think she's harsh; i think rules are what children need and strive for it brings peace to them when they know where they stand!
lol.........I think she had a fair crack at bringing me up.
An awful lot of it sounds familiar.
the 8pm rule was not observed on a farm.
I am still glad there is that verse that says...Father's provoke not your children to wrath..
except it was usually my Mother provoking me........little saint that I was.
I was very adept at quoting that verse.
we were very short on 11 12
Via email Renae said...
I have read a few of Susanna Wesley's rules before, but never all together. They are very thought provoking. I think I'll work on getting my kids to bed by 8. Wouldn't that be nice? I look forward to the discussion!
Excellent. e-Mom, always love reading your articles. Have a great week. Sending you a hug.
Love that- teach a child to pray as soon as he can speak. Thanks for sharing!
lol....i like some of her rules....she was a bit harsh but it was the culture then really....i always had my children in bed by 7:30 pm from toddler stage right up thru 2nd grade! yes they thot that was unfair but they did sooooo much better in preschool/early elem. that way. Now they still have bedtimes...only later of course! and the snack thing....our pediatrician actually says children and teens NEED snacks (nutritious ones) 2 times a day.....and let's face it, us moms like em too!
I love "Require no daughter to work before she can read well." It may have been that education for females was undervalued in those days--but not by Susannah Wesley. I appreciate how so many women best known for their associations with great men were also advocates of women's education (Abigail Adams is another prime example.)
I think I need to work on #12 more. I tend to notice the mess more than the effort when my little ones try to help around the house.
Thanks for this list. It is wonderful. I have so many thoughts on it I decided to write a blog post on it (http://lettersfromnebby.wordpress.com/2010/08/11/household-rules/).
If I had nineteen children I think I'd be pretty stict with them too, otherwise it would be a riot!!
Some of these rules are very forward thinking, such as 8., 15. and 11.
Buffy: LOL, a "riot" indeed! Sadly, only 10 of Susannah's 19 children made it to adulthood. But that's still a crowd! ღ
Just pulled out my bio on her to read...well this is great. I kinda stumbled with the not having a daughter work until she could read...my girl was my late reader and still is the messies of all...I can't imagine not having her learn to work first.
I know my mom had us all four in bed before dark...always!
Good advice for this grey hair mom!!!
Now to start that book on her!
Thanks
Sugar Tails: It's interesting to reflect on the childrearing methods of a seventeenth century Mom, isn't it? Some of her language is archaic (e.g. "fear the rod") but as you've suggested, her principles are sound.
Studies have shown that kids reared in the most structured environments are the most secure. Somehow Mrs. W. managed to keep her brood in check! (Did you know that Susannah herself was the youngest of 25 children? Imagine that!)
April: I agree, you can't let a group that size run amok!
Amydeanne: Yes, children do need to know their boundaries.
ozjane: Oh dear. It sounds like you were raised too harshly. Did you have brothers?
Renae: Regular bedtimes keeps kids AND Mom sane. When our children were small, I always knew that I would be "off the clock" and could relax after 7:30 PM.
Lynn: Thanks friend!
Sandra: Brilliant isn't it?
Faith: LOL, I'm sure you're snacks are just as nutritious as your meals. You're a very good cook!
Bekahcubed: I agree. I'm guessing that Susannah would have been employed as a teacher, if she didn't have such a large family to rear.
Jennifer: You're a wise Mom!
Nebby3: Thanks for following up with your own post!
Janette: Enjoy your book on Susannah! She's certainly one of my heros. I'll be over to visit your blog soon. Hugs!
I love the list! Some I do think were interestingly strict "no complaining when taking medicine", none of us do that well. But I think it is all very good and for good reasons. And like everyone has said 17 children required much rules to survive!
Love her rules! :D Wish I could adopt some of those into my own home and be consistent.
Kim: Nobody likes to take medicine. :( Sadly, only 10 children survived to adulthood.
Sherry: God bless you in your parenting. ღ
emom, I was so happy to read all the positive things you put in response to your readers. I come from a very negative, alcoholic family (that I love dearly!) and I am trying to raise my own children without having any tools or training. Its hard. So I love to come across what I call 'little moments of light' where God shows me what a healthy behavior is and how I can imitate it. You just did that for me. This website is blessing added to blessing.
Courtney Welcome to Chrysalis! Do you have a blog? I'd love to visit.
I'm so sorry you come from an alcoholic family. (My husband does too, BTW. And we both come from divorced families.) All that to say that I hear your heart, and I understand your struggle.
I encourage you to learn learn from good Christian books, and of course the Bible--it CAN be done. Our chidren are young adults now... and lovely vibrant Christians.
May you be mightily blessed in your parenting!
e-Mom ღ
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